If Sloane Crosley & I Were Friends We Would TOTALLY Be BFFs

Whilst a brief trip to Powells Book Kingdom, the smaller Hawthorne sister store, I happened upon this book: I Was Told There'd Be Cake essays by Sloane Crosley. Now I have TRIED to switch to using the library, but my library has roughly 10 books and thus involves the act of ordering books from other libraries, or (God Forbid!!), heading down town to what is probably the biggest and most overwhelming library I have ever seen. The problem with THAT library is that it is both down town AND, again, the biggest and most overwhelming library I have ever seen. That being said I occassionally wander into the beauty that is Powells and try to stick to the books with little orange sale stickers on them. But there, nearly jumping out at me on the regular, not even center or end cap, but regular shelf was this book. I picked it up, looked at it and put it back. I wandered. It beckoned. So I picked it up, looked at it and somehow it slipped into my grasp and I HAD to purchase it and start reading it the moment I got on the bus.

Now, here is why we would be BFFs: Sloane Crosley has written my stories already. There certainly are some differences, and a certain degree of talent that exceeds my own, but she, like Douglas Coupland, has snuck inside my head and stolen my thoughts and put them on, now published, paper. She made me realize that most of what I actually write, versus most of what I think or simply journal, is really sort of sad. It is depressing and reflective. It is not ironic or quirky. Irony and quirk - they stay in my head and my moleskin journal.

I imagine she and I would have coffee, but irregularly as she seems to have the same friend problems as me - poor contact, out of the loop, a great re-connecter but not so great with the staying power there. She has her friends, but these are the ones that secretly became fringe-friends. Who she can love but never speak to. While it is a little different for me, it's out there. I get it. So there at coffee we would laugh about this. We would laugh about weird relationship things - like ponies (please read essay #1: The Pony Problem) and other such oddities. I would get her opinion on the books of essays that by then I will totally be writing. Did I mention we'd be laughing? And we would probably have mimosas (if it were early in the day).

So if Sloane Crosley and I were friends I would obviously be an author. Simple. True. Mildly nuerotic and unfeasible and really not a good reason to not currently be seeking authorship by the writing of illeged stories of hilarity that live in my head - but an excuse nonetheless.

Be well Sloane - BFF - maybe we could get those necklaces too.